Tuesday, June 30, 2009

My Top 10 Fav Songs- June 2009

Here we go; a couple of newbie’s made the list:

1. Danyew- Streetlights
Can I say I absolutely love him and it was right after I heard the song? I downloaded the song and never really had a chance to listen to it and then it played….the rest is history. It feels so good to listen to good music that also exalts the Lord.

2. Francesca Battistelli- Free To Be Me
I found this song on one of my Youth member’s iPod. I loved it, I like the fact that she is saying because He died, and she is free to be who she is. In Christ there is liberty and nothing beats Christ.

3. Grey Holiday- You Belong to Me
I personally like this song. This song speaks to the Prodigal Son in all of us. We run from God and He’s just patiently waiting for us to come back home. I am so upset that they disbanded. Argh!


4. Stacie Orrico- I Could Be the One
This is an oldie but goody! I was playing her album in my room and kept playing this song over and over. In this song she is saying that she could be the one that God uses; she isn’t thinking that she’s nothing. If God can use a donkey he can definitely use us.

5. DC Talk- Godsend
The first Christian love song I fell in love with. To call someone your Godsend, the person God especially sent apart for you sounds so much better then a soul mate. I remember the first time I heard this song I literally put my hand on my heart and started to swoon, lol. I love this song.

6. Audio Adrenaline- Ocean Floor
This song is definitely one of those songs that make you want to cry. This song talks about how our sins, wrong doings etc. are forgiven and at the bottom of the ocean floor. I am so happy for Grace. God is so good!

7. Point of Grace- How You Live (Turn Up the Music)
I used to play this song when my grandmother first past. She was a beautiful and amazing woman. It’s been a year this month, but it still feels like yesterday. The song tells you to live each day to the fullest because it doesn’t matter who your friends were but how you lived your life.

8. Bethany Dillon- Holy Is the Lord
I love worship songs by other genres. This song is so beautiful! Our Lord is so amazing and He requires so much from us but no matter what He is still holy.

9. Jennifer Knapp- Say Won’t You Say
This is another oldie. I will always like this song; it has the ability to always stick in my head.

10. The Elms- Hey, Hey
This was the first Elms song I ever heard. I was on the WOW mix. I wanted to know more about them because I liked their style, and I still do.

I hope you liked my selection. Next month will have a lot of new artists.

Monday, June 29, 2009

If You Just Realized What I Just Realized.....

I would have been the first to admit that I didn’t think anyone would miss me while I was on vacation, but I was wrong. I didn’t realize how much I was appreciated or better yet, how much I missed the job. I guess absence does make the heart grow fonder, lol. On Saturday, my girlfriend and I were talking about my past relationship and why it is a hindering block to my future one. We were discussing that my mind frame is still in the past and I need release to be able to look to the present. Thinking about it now, I couldn’t agree more. I am going to be honest: I have a problem with looking into the future. I know who I am supposed to be with; but I am afraid to see myself with them because I look at it as a hindering block. I remember God was dealing with me on that subject. Last week, I was twisting and turning and was upset when he popped into my head. Then God asked me why I couldn’t see myself with what he has given me? I mean, when we know we were getting a bike or a new gift as a kid or a new thing as an adult; we envision ourselves with it, thinking about how we will look with it, what we would do, etc. so why couldn’t I do it now? I realized while God had forgiven me about my past and placed it in the sea of forgetfulness; I have held on to it and turned it into my handicap.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

It Takes A Little Time Sometimes....

Today is one of my spiritual older sister 12 year anniversary. I am so happy for her. It just goes to show you what happens when you make God your foundation. She still gets giddy when she talks about him, and she respects him. I look at them and I realize you can see the difference between a Christian couple and a secular couple. My Bishop and First Lady have been married for over 40 years. They still look at each other with respect and adoration….. It’s sickening sometimes (just kidding). We had a meeting for our upcoming Women’s Conference to go over the last minute details and ended up talking about relationships. It’s been a regular thing now, there’s a bulk of the youth that has hit that point so of course it will be always in the air. The end result was my cousin and I went to our friend’s house to watch this seminar by a minister from Ohio about Love, Sex and Relationships. All I can say is “ “. I am totally speechless. It was so amazing and it was just the introduction! The seminar has 10 parts; I am so excited to see the next…. Well, I have work in the morning, be blessed.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

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Here Comes the Brides!

Today was actually fun! I have a lot of ideas for my cousins wedding (she asked me to be the planner and help her out because I know her like the back of my hand). It is so funny how quickly things are happening. One minute we think boys are ugly and have cooties, the next minute we can’t wait to find our help mate. In the midst of the entire wedding craze and the constantly telling all the vendors at the Expo that I am not a bride but a friend there for support, I found myself at peace with it all. Right now, it’s not my season for a relationship. I am in my winter season; things are dying and cold but it’s a season that must happen so I can get to spring. I know that when its time, its time; but right now I am content. That’s the best way you can be.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Last Minute Prepping

Today consists of sorting laundry, food shopping for the next two weeks, and a hair appointment. I realized that I am one of those demented people who like to actually be busy (I know, I’m neurotic). I am looking forward to tomorrow, I will be going to the Bridal Expo with my girlfriend’s (I have one friend getting married in August, the other next September) and I will actually enjoy myself. Today in Youth Service we talked about Evangelism. Over the next couple of months, we will be evangelizing in different locations in Brooklyn. We will also have a couple of Outreach services where we have service outside of our church. We decided to make things interesting and do one night for girls and one for the guys. I can’t wait to see what they have to offer.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Celebration of Life and Death of a King

Today is my cousins’ 26th birthday. She is going out on a hot date, lol. Well it’s not a date; they are meeting up for her birthday at The Olive Garden. I know that this time next year things will so different. My cousin and best friend will be married, my other best friend will be planning her marriage and where will I be? Hmm…. something to ponder. Today Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett died, while everyone is talking about their legacy I am wondering if they will be in heaven or hell. Time waits for no one; and it best to live each moment as if it’s your last. I want when its time to go that I regret nothing but thank God for everything……Well my vacation ends tomorrow and I will be at work starting Monday, so I will enjoy my last day off tomorrow.

Laughter Builds


I've been doing a bit of work lately that has required me to articulate some work I'm accustomed to doing instinctively. Specifically, building comic structure.

[Big, protracted, pet-peevy sidenote: I do not understand the need for the word "comedic." It's very existence irritates me. There's probably some very specific, distinct reasoning behind its use, and I'd love for somebody to explain it to me, but even given a reasoned explanation I'll probably continue to literally cringe every time I hear it. Do we hear "tragedic"? No; we hear "tragic." Comic. Comic comic COMIC!]

So -- building comic structure. At some later date I'll address what's gotten me started so specifically on this subject, but it also looks to be useful work in preparation for our new curriculum for In Bocca al Lupo. Friend Heather and I have had to modify our lesson plans owing to two factors: 1) having students enrolled who have taken our workshops previously, and 2) having master classes with Italian actors who can certainly offer more insightful training in commedia dell'arte than we can. When we took a look at what we could offer that was new, relevant and supportive of the lessons others would be teaching, techniques for building comic (COMIC!) structures and sequencing came out at the top of the list.

It's funny (See what I did there?): This is the sort of thing that's generally considered to be a talent or instinct, similar to singing, or mathematics. We tend to equate the ability to construct comedy to one's sense of humor -- an intangible mix of givens and environmental influences that somehow result in one person "being funny," and another, not so much. AND we tend to equate "having a sense of humor" with being funny, which is right off. After all, you can be completely incapable of telling a joke or pulling off a fall, yet still enjoy a fine appreciation of others' comedy. In other words, we are adrift in a mire of assumptions and generality when it comes to the larger subject of humor. Sure, there are comic prodigies, just as there are mathematical ones. The fact is, however, that building comic structure is an ability, a skill, and it can be learned and honed.

But how do you teach that?

I've put together a lot of theories, and some are more tested than others. Certainly the bulk of the work we've done in Zuppa del Giorno has given me experience to draw from, both in the form of what's helpful to building a comic story, and what's more of a "what not to do" lesson. We have developed many exercises and guiding principles in our work that apply to this more-general challenge, and we are lacking in some areas due to the specificity of our work. We're never focused solely on "making something funny"; rather the emphasis is on "making a contemporary commedia dell'arte story," or "making a new story in the style of silent film." This is an interesting point to notice in and of itself -- that once the techniques are ingrained, you need a specific focus in order to use them effectively. Breaking down the techniques themselves, however, takes some new, encompassing thoughts and actions. The danger here is in over-generalizing.

To my mind, the ultimate goal is to offer to the students as many useful ways as possible to get them in a mode in which they are excited to build the story. When that enthusiasm sets in("enthusiasm" is a better word for it), creating a comedy becomes more about communication and the collaboration than it is about fear or getting it "right." This can be said of any collaborative effort, but I find it particularly essential to comic storytelling. For all my perceived poo-pooing of the role of instinct in developing comedy, there is a very distinctive feeling that overcomes us when we really hook into a fruitful collaboration, and the better taste of that we can offer the students the better they'll understand what to aim for and how to guide themselves in future efforts. Teaching that is the way to teach them to fish for themselves, rather than simply slapping a fish down on the table.

Of course, there's more to it than that, especially if you're aiming for (as we are) teaching how to build good comedy. There's the rhythm, and the notion of threes, and contrast, and reversal of expectation, and separation of beats, and the logical absurdity (thank you, Gary C. Hopper) . . . and a bunch more, I'm sure. There is, in other words, no shortage of theory and technique to be instructed and applied, which is very good for us. But the thing to focus on in on, it seems to me, is the build. Find the build, and the comedy follows.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

I'm Going to Be Honest

The Lord has been dealing with me about a certain area of my life where I can truly say I lack faith in: my love life. I will be brutally honest with you: I have made many mistakes in my past and I don’t feel I should be given anything for it. I mean, I know who God has for me but it feels like I would be more of a hindrance to him that a helpmate. And I realize that thinking is preventing me from moving towards what’s mine. When God told Abraham he would be a Father of many nations and he was extremely old did Abraham say “no God, there seems to be some kind of error”? No. He believed; he didn’t question God or try to figure out God’s plan he just let go and let God. These days we seem to forget that God is still the God that can move mountains, part seas, heal you just on your faith alone. So why do we limit Him to what we can do? God is so much bigger than us, so let us not put Him in a box or try to figure out what His next move is or how we’re getting to our “promise land”.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Prayer and Fast Day 9- On the Way

I wonder why God stays with us in the midst of all the mess that we do, I mean if you think about how many errors you make in one day; would you stay by your side at the end of the day? But God is merciful, and His grace is sufficient. He is amazing to us and does amazing things for us. I know I am not worthy of the blessings He bestows upon me and I won’t lie and say that I am. I know where I have been and what I have done. But the sooner I realize how far He has brought me, the sooner I can realize its better to stay in Him and not in the world. One of my friends on Facebook used the quote “There are no shortcuts to anywhere worth going”. That is so true when you think

Vikram Bhatt's 14-Year-Old Daughter Took Him and His Ex-Wife Out For Dinner

Vikram Bhatt is in the middle of shooting his next adventure thriller titled Shaapit. He is producing six films this year but that doesn't mean it's all about work. The currently-single director is enjoying bonding with his daughter Krishna, and how they had a Father's Day dinner together, two days ago. Here Vikram talks about his daughter's plans to follow in his footsteps and why he isn't ready to get into another relationship among other things...

You daughter took you out for Father's Day dinner...
It was sort of a surprise, and a pleasant one at that. Since it was Father's Day, Krishna decided to take my ex-wife Aditi and me out for dinner. She also bought me a couple of trinkets and a scroll which was a big surprise for me. I think she really made the day special for me.

You are closer to her than you were before?
Yes, Krishna is now fourteen and takes an active interest in my work. I am happy with the time I share with her today, and we try and spend as much together as possible.

Didn't you say you made Ankahee for her? Was she happy with the film?
Yes it was made for her and she's watched it quite a few times. As for her opinion on the film, she's very quiet about it.

What does you daughter think of your films?
Well, she has mixed opinions. There are films that she has liked and some she hasn't. But she does watch everything I make and has a firm opinion, which does matter to me and I take it very seriously.

Does she plan to follow in your footsteps?
Yes, she wants to be a director some day. In fact, she co-wrote the script for my TV series on Sony. She loves to be around when I am narrating a script that's her favourite part. In fact, now that am in the middle of film making, Krishna loves to come and spend time on my sets whenever possible.

Do you meet your ex-wife? Are things cordial now?
I can say that things are good and there are a couple of areas that I need to work on, and some things that need to be set right, and it will all happen in good time.

Why haven't you been in a relationship since Ameesha?
I don't want to hide my relation if I am in one. I don't feel the need to be with anyone at the moment.

Does your daughter ever talk about you getting married?
No, she doesn't want me to have a girlfriend. In fact, she's clearly told me that she has to approve the next woman that comes into my life. I guess I will have to obey her command!

You have repeated Adah Sharma in Phirr, is it true that she's signed an exclusive contract with you?
I have no exclusive contract whatsoever with Adah. In fact, that only happens in the first film with new actors. But Adah is free to work with outside directors. However she hasn't really been offered much work. But I am happy to have her on board for Phirr.

How are you balancing directing and producing?
It's not that difficult. I am producing six films under ASA productions. Presently, I am directing Shaapit with Aditya Narayan, then there is Three with Nausheen Ali Sardar and Aashish Choudhary, directed by Vishal Pandya. Then there is Phirr with Adah and Rajneesh. Besides this, Khalid Mohamed will also be directing a film.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Prayer and Fast Day 8- I Will Remember You....

Today my grandmother passed a year ago. She was the cornerstone and backbone of my family. I never loved someone as much as I loved her. The hardest thing for me was watching her slowly disintegrate. I will always remember that she was fond of light houses. When she used to live in Barbados as a little girl, she used to live in one. The funny thing is that she was a light house for me. She showed me that you could still stand for Jesus and let her light shine. I will always remember and always love her.

Noir-Xploitation


On Friday last I spent the morning in a suit-n-tie, spitting out rapid-fire dialogue and looking out at the world with bright eyes through squinted lids. Externally, I was a rock -- a firm, callous, image of a man enduring through a quandary, and doing it on very little sleep. Internally, I was a mess, roiling with the myriad, varied possibilities of failure and conscience. Oddly enough -- perhaps even fortunately -- my personal situation reflected that of my character.

Last Friday I played the immortal character of Sam Spade in the final scene from The Maltese Falcon as a part of Michael Bow's final project for one of his film classes. Now there I was, not a week ago posting about the importance of managing a little leisure time into an otherwise busy schedule (see 6/16/09), and I'm afraid it rather made Michael's life more difficult that morning. You see, Dear Reader, I must admit that I was not entirely solid on my lines. Oh I tried hard to be, losing sleep on both ends the night before and recording them for myself to play back at every possible moment, but I'm afraid I must confess defeat. It may have been a different matter if the material had been other than it was, but good ol' Bogey set the standard for Spade, and there's just no other way to pull off that dialogue but rapid-fire. We'll see how it turned out. In fact, I'm probably more screwed by any errors than Michael, since the only value for me of this work is potential material for a talent reel. But I don't envy him the editing job he's got ahead of him.

I won't rescind my earlier statement about the importance of prioritizing leisure (or living) time. I stick by it. Effective time management is equally important, however, and sometimes one only gets one chance to get it right. Particularly, it seems, when it comes to film.

It's such a strange medium to me, film. On the one hand, you've got multiple takes, hence multiple times to rise to the occasion (less so when your entire shooting time is under two hours). On the other, the actor is almost solely responsible for any rehearsal work that goes into that concentrated period of "getting it right." It seems, in this way, a largely lonely and artificial medium. Yet theatre is also artificial, just in different ways. It's all artifice, and the "art" of it lies in a commonality between the two: Making it live. I'm decent at breathing life into theatre. On film, well, I could use more practice. And in the meantime, good editing.

All that aside, it was an enjoyable experience. Even my sense of panic over the lines was a welcome change of pace from a sense of panic over office supplies, or powers of attorney. I was paired up with Allison Goldberg as the femme fatale, and we have been arbitrarily paired up in the past in productions her aunt, Janice Goldberg, has directed. (There are invariably jokes about nepotism whenever Allison is in one of Janice's reading events -- I think I could be counted an adopted relative at this point.) I don't know Allison particularly well, which served the scene, but we were familiar enough with one another that trust was there and joking with each other wouldn't be a problem. Fortunately for me, she's also funny, and a good actor. More than once, as I terrifyingly blanked on a line, I found Allison there, as present as ever, and it allowed me to actually let it go and help keep the scene afloat.

Working in film and television is one of those goals of mine that I haven't pursued as avidly as I'd have liked. I've been so focused on a specific theatre career that I consider myself to be rather behind on those credits and experiences. Then again, it may have been a good choice for me. The kind of theatre I most love to do -- the physically interesting kind, let's say -- is best attempted and trained in while young, and film work can (theoretically, at least) be sought in spite of just about any gross limitations. In my efforts to explore this area of acting more, I'll have to be patient with my own lack of experience (NOT a strength of mine), as well as vigilant about avoiding an underestimation of the work to be involved. Stepping into the shoes and world of a character I idolize is good motivation. As well as a humbling experience.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Prayer and Fast Day 7- Relax

Today after church, we went to see the movie The Proposal. It was great: great shoes, great guy, great girl, and great concept. I enjoyed being with the girls and in the city for something either than work related. Afterwards, we went to my best friend’s boyfriend LES apartment (did I mention I am in love with him, lol) to play video games and hang out. I realized in the midst of the hanging out that I actually felt lonely. I felt like I was alone in the crowd. It’s a funny feeling to try to describe. I know that God is there in the midst of everything, but sometimes we need a little reminding.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Prayer and Fast Day 6- Wake Up Call

I have never been so shaken to my core from a dream that seem so real and it wasn’t a nightmare. The problem was that it was a nightmare for the other person in the dream and I was the monster! I was ruining my ex-boyfriends current girlfriend’s life; and in the dream I was totally oblivious to it! I couldn’t go back to sleep. To someone else, this sounds like nothing but to me it feels like a wake-up call. I need to let go completely. That little remnant, that little remainder of hope that we still carry needs to be killed, destroyed. The funny thing is that I have no one to talk to about this but the Lord. I remember hearing that God would put you in a place where you can’t go to anyone else but Him. It’s then when you get your release, because you went to the One person who can take care of it all.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Prayer and Fast Day 5- It Finally Happened!

My phone keypad stopped working! I had to give it up for an hour to be repaired! I knew it had to happen, I actually feel better without it (maybe that’s because I know it’s only for an hour). I feel that you have to make certain things priorities and certain things optional. I am asking the Lord to reveal to me the Ministry He has called me to and help me discern his voice.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Prayer and Fast Day 4- Keep Me Lord

My phone is starting to act up………I know, don’t say it! I feel that this is a hindrance in my relationship with God. The phone needs to take a serious back seat. Sigh. My friend that would like to be my “boyfriend” and believe me, I use that word very loosely isn’t speaking to me as much. You know what’s so funny; he barely talked to me this whole fast. Its only shows to me who belongs in my life and who doesn’t. I was reading a snippet from this book called Fasting- by Jentezen Franklin in Barnes and Noble; and I can’t wait to buy it! He says when you fast you open yourself up to hear from God! How amazing is that! I think that makes withstanding and seeking Him so worth it!

Class Act


{You've probably been 'blogging for too long when you start to feel, with every post title, "I must have used THIS pun before...."}

I have a lot of semi-traumatic memories of school. I say semi-traumatic because, in spite of how very very real they were to me at the time, in light of some more adult tragedies it seems inapt to apply the same word. Still and all -- without that perspective and with the fiery, passionate, all-or-nothing stakes of youth -- some of these events were rather defining for me. I was thinking of one of the less traumatic (possibly even redemptive of...something...) ones this morning as I hurriedly recorded my lines for tomorrow's film gig in the hopes of absorbing them through audio osmosis. In a history class in what I recall as being my junior year of high school, I gave a presentation on the Israeli/Palestinian conflict, and afterward a guy who had given me a hard time in the past rather announced to the class, "Hey, you were acting. That was just like when you act." Somehow I had the presence of mind not to feel injured by this call-out (it was definitely an effort to draw negative attention to me) and I calmly responded, "Yeah, I was. I can do that." And sat down. And the class continued, my would-be persecutor left scratching his head a bit at why acting was allowed in class.

Yesterday I returned to Hunter College to teach an Intro. to Theatre class about the (living) history of commedia dell'arte. I've taught similar classes at Hunter before, though always a shorter class with more students, and to date always with my commedia partner-in-crime, Heather Stuart. This was, in other words, something of a new experience for me. Oh, and in addition to these circumstances, it was my first time really teaching solo for a class of desk-bound students -- generally non-actors who hadn't any expressed interest in getting out of the seats to try the work on for size. I was made a little nervous by it. (Ironically, I got three potential In Bocca al Lupo-ers out of them, but I couldn't have known that was a possibility ahead of time.) As far as I was concerned, I was there to lecture. In my own, inimitable style.

Said "inimitable style" involves quite a bit of amateurish waffling and tangential thinking.

The class went well, actually, I think. The teacher, Sascha Just, was complimentary afterward. Most of the people seemed to be engaged most of the time, and I certainly never ran out of things to talk about. There were gaffs, and the lesson plan needs more work for certain, but in balance I'd say it was a success. I was pleasantly surprised by some techniques I implemented that were half-planned, half-spun-out-on-the-spot; rather like working from a scenario. I asked the students periodically to imagine themselves in the shoes of a commedia dell'arte troupe of the 1500s; not in a "picture-this" way, but more actively, using modern equivalents and inviting them to draw images without requiring that they do so. This worked to wake them from note-taking stupors, and also helped us find a common ground when I got cyclical or tangential in whatever aspect I was covering at a given moment. "Where was I? Back to the piazza...." I also had the idea to tell them to interrupt me whenever they had a question or a reaction. They didn't take me up on this too much, but a little, and I was pleased with how it kept things lively and served to illustrate the level of interaction traditional commedia had with its unpretentious audiences.

I was acting. I was very much putting on a show. In another interesting parallel, though, it reminded me of the first time I used mask work in performance. This was not in a commedia context, per se, but it did involve a similar half-mask style. I was suddenly divorced from a powerful component of my acting -- my facial expressions. I had to relearn what read to an audience, which gestures and intonations would connect without facial cues, and I can assure you that it was a rocky start to demonstrating that particular skill. Hopefully I've improved since. Hopefully, too, I'll learn more and more about teaching a class in an actual classroom, as opposed to a theatre, or movement studio. I couldn't jump about too much there, and it affected everything from my method of description to changes in my overall energy pattern. I had quite a patter kept up; definitely could have afforded a bit more relaxation, but by the same token I believe my enthusiasm for the subject was welcome.

I left feeling very gratified. In a way, finding this new way of expressing the essentials of commedia dell'arte renewed my excitement for it, which will be very valuable indeed in the coming month. My enthusiasm while teaching in Italy will be genuine. I won't even have to act!

Er, wait . . .

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

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