I Am Not My Own

"Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God?You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body."
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (ESV)

I love these verses. Not only because they cancel out everything the world says about our body belonging to us so we can do what we want, but they also shows us how sacred our body is. Our body is a temple. The definition of a temple is an edifice or place dedicated to the service or worship of a deity (God, for us Christians). A temple is also a place of  that the Holy Spirit inhabits. My body is a temple....that's a pretty sobering discovery. The Holy Spirit lives in me. In me! So....that means that it must always be kept clean, must always be cleansed, checked for cracks, leaks etc.

I am not my own. Well, that changes everything. If I was my own, I can do whatever, whenever, however with whoever, but since I was bought with a price (Jesus' blood) and now belong to Him; I have to live a life that allows Him to be able to call on me at all times...that being said I move to my next topic.

Lately, I have taken out certain things (coffee...sigh..., excess sugars, salts, etc.) from my eating habits because I have to start beating my body into shape for the dance ministry. And from my daily devotionals, God seems to agree with me. To be honest, it has to be one of the hardest things to do: to remind myself that my body is the Lord's temple and what I do or don't do (insert lack of exercise and sleep) and put into it really matters. So when I went for that run last week and my body was crying out in protest I had to recite Philippians 4:13 to myself (literally, it was that bad) to keep going.

The good thing is I'm noticing the difference already, and I am going to need the extra energy for the 6 hour rehearsals with the dance teams and that doesn't even include the hours for working on the dances and music.....which brings me to the next topic: music. I love good music; get a guitar and drums involved and I am happy, get some soca involved and you have trouble. Lol, what can I say, its the Barbadian in me. My hips just start to move. I have to admit lately I have drifted from my Christian music to secular indie bands and my old poison of choice: Maroon 5. Listening to Maroon 5 and trying to keep pure thoughts is not possible, I mean have heard their lyrics? Their lyrics give me visuals....visuals grow into desires....desires grow into opportunities.....opportunities grow into sin....sin prevents me from ministering in dance....which prevents the message that God has called me to deliver to be aborted....which puts me back at square one....which is me further back than where I need to be....which translated to delete Maroon 5 off of my Pandora.
 So, now that I am aware of what I am putting in my temple, how I am taking care of my temple, the music that I listen to that sets an atmosphere of worship, He will always be able to us me... I can't wait to get there. Be blessed.

2011 Plans

So....I have been thinking about 2011 and what it means for me: Another year to get closer to who I am called to be. So these are the things I am looking forward to:

Designing: So....where do I start? I am planning to enter the Operation Bridal Dress this year for real (lol). The deadline is like next week, so I have to start asap. I am looking forward to purchasing 2 dress forms (1 size 6 or 8, the other size 16). I was blessed with a sewing machine by my founder of my church. I will be practicing with patterns, fabrics, etc. learning how to sew and design old school. By September, I should be ready for the Parsons Fashion Design Certificate Program.

Dance: I can't wait to start dancing again; I miss the freedom and discipline of it. I have events at church that I will have to start working on and now that we have 3 dance groups in the ministry I will have my hands full (but I won't complain; I'm actually looking forward to it). I am looking into Modern Dance, and Jazz now. I will always go back to Ballet but I want to broaden my abilities.

Wedding Planning: I guess this will end up being a part-time job soon, lol. I am in the process of planning my cousins wedding and pretty soon a sister from my church as well. I have the Love Dinner that is coming up in February and I will be in charge of the design and set up. We will be able to have more freedom and funds now that everyone is looking forward to it this year.


Decorating: I was planning on moving out but after some praying I realize I should stay in my current apartment (which is huge) and redecorate. As soon as I told my sister she got excited and nearly passed out. I am looking around for some cool pieces to make the apartment more like us.

Relationships/Friendships: Big problem in this area. I don't trust women enough to want to be around them. I have a couple of girlfriends that I trust and would do anything for but that's it. I have made a new guy friend who loves museums and whatnot so we have been running around everywhere late last year and early this year together but I'm still waiting for God to introduce more God-fearing and trust worthy friends into my circle. Relationship wise: I leave that COMPLETELY in God's hands. Lol.

Volunteer Work: I had the wonderful opportunity to participate in Boxes of Love last year. This year I would love to do more volunteer and community work. My dream goal is to be able to travel and do something amazing like Habitat for Humanity.

Hair: I want to understand my hair and not get frustrated and keep it short. I also would love to see my natural hair colour, so I will try (try being the key word) to not colour my hair as well. I don't consider myself a "natural" or on a discovery. I am just the same ole my (minus my gamine cut).

Health: I want to stay on top of eating healthy. I also want to stay fit (Love my hourglass; so I don't want to lose any weight).

Last but not least Spiritual Walk: Sigh.... where do I begin? I want to grow and have a better understanding of the word. I want to be an example to the younger girls that for some reason always find themselves attached to me. Most importantly I want to love unconditionally; that's a hard thing I'm learning. Loving people has been a hard thing for me; the more I am exposed to human nature the more I want to stay to myself....but apparently that's not God's will for me -_-



So, if it's God's will that I see the end of the year I can't wait to check off everything on this list (even the hair stuff, lol). Be blessed, and have an amazing and powerful New Year!

It's Been Too Long...

Where do I start? Well, I can start at apologizing for not posting these past 2 weeks. My job blocked blogger so I will be posting via cell phone again for a while. So that being said, let me update you:


My hair: I dyed it an espresso brown colour and I like it so far. My beautician is talking about highlights but I keep avoiding the subject.

Work: Same thing, different day. I am grateful that I have a job and God has continued to make a way for me.

-Dance: I'm so busy looking into programs for dance and listening to songs and praying to find out what direction the Lord wants me to move with this Ministry. I'm not going to lie, I'm nervous; I want to touch people and move them when we minister in dance not just do some pretty movements to music. I don't know, maybe its just me. I feel like I'm in a stage where God is showing me where I am and where I need to be to do great works in His name; and I am seriously coming up short.

School: I am interested in attending Parsons for a Certificate in Fashion Design and then go to F.I.T. for Merchandising. I love fashion, and love to design. I feel its time to work on my craft.

Relationships: Still the same. I managed to keep up with my guidelines I told you about earlier. So you can imagine how rarely my phone rings or when I receive text messages. I know its not in vain so I won't stress it. It's for a purpose....also update about waiting: I will be honest about that; It sucks! It boils down to this I rather be waiting and miserable than in a relationship that I have no business in and have to deal with the consequences.

Other things: Right now I'm getting (slowly) use to the idea of it being all girls in the house (my mother, sister and I). The reason why: I do all the dirty work (killing bugs, throwing out the trash, draining the sink, etc). I don't like it one bit, lol. Saturday night we had our College Fund Concert and Singspiration. I can truly say it was a blessing as well as a success. We had a packed house and the children sang their hearts out. I have also made a resolution to start dressing my age. I have realized that my closet resembles the closets of middle age mothers. I am no where near middle age and I have no children so that's not a good look. I have filled out into a size 6 ( I love the hourglass pin-up look) and I have been hiding my curves. But no more! I will embrace my curves, love my figure and dress like a 25 year old woman.


....That's just a little update, be bless.

A Weekend to Relax

Stacy, Atoya and I woke up early Saturday morning to look for Stacy's wedding dress. While getting up that early was not on the top of my list for the weekend, the fun we had was worth it. We went to Clinton Hill and DUMBO to check out dresses and did a little site seeing. I think I might consider being a Brooklynite again. Our day included a sushi restaurant (even though I could only have tofu and sweet potatoes because of the Daniel's Fast) and hanging around the DUMBO area site seeing before I had dance rehearsal with the girls. Today ended the fast and I am so happy to see that I have seen so many changes in my life and those who were partaking in the fast. God is good, all the time. All the time, God is good. Be blessed.

Atoya & Stacy

Stacy & Me

My Top 10 Fav Songs- November 2009

I know; I have been horrible with my blogging. I’m so sorry. I have been busy with Bible School (which is sooo much work I’m learning). That being said, here’s my list for November:

1. Relient K- Scene and Herd
I love Relient K! Who doesn’t? I have to have them on my play list. Their song titles are funny but there’s always a message in the bottle. Got to love Relient K!

2. Plumb- Hang On
I fell in love with this group when I first heard the dance version to “Cut”. They have a new album “Beautiful History” out (it is so going on my Christmas List) and I’m extra excited over it. The song is amazing. It tells you that in the midst of it all; hang on and don’t let go. We need to learn how to hang on in the hard times of our lives. We seem to forget sometimes Who we serve and that He can deliver us.

3. Phil Wickham- Coming Alive
He’s a newbie on my play list, even though I have heard a few songs. I like the song; especially the chorus. It says: “now, we’re coming alive/ yeah we’re coming alive/open your hearts, take what’s inside and let go.” That line alone is awesome. I plan to keep my eye on this artist.

4. Terra, Terra, Terra- Paradigm
New band alert! So there’s this band….and they’re called Terra, Terra, Terra…and there are awesome! I am sooo looking forward to hearing more of their music and learning more about them.

5. Rush of Fools- Can’t Get Away
I was trying to track down a particular song and I ended up with this song. It says no matter what we do or how hard we try; we can’t get away. But who would want to? I know I wouldn’t want to get away from Him.

6. Dream Pilots- Comedown
New Band Alert! They come from Norway and I have to say, they sound like they are here to stay. Their song “Comedown” is catchy and was on replay for the better half of my day. Lol. I look forward to hearing more from them.

7. Brooke Fraser- Seeds
I Love Brooke! Lol, really I do. This song poses the question what do we leave for the next generation. It really makes you think. It’s an awesome song; really it is.

8. Bethany Dillon- Reach Out
Where do I begin with Mrs. Bethany? Like Brooke, she is one of my favorite acoustic rock artists. The song “Reach Out” tells the story of the woman with the issue of blood in the New Testament. If we just reach out and come out of our comfort zone we will be able to reach our healing.

9. Coko- He Made A Way
I’m not really into R&B, but this song is so good! The song is a catchy tune that reminds you of a very important thing: “He made a way/He always makes a way.” I love this song.

10. Shekinah Glory Ministry- Bow Down And Worship Him
This is the song for the Children’s church Christmas dance. They girls come in after Jesus was born and they dance before Him. I love this song. It has been one of the easiest and hardest songs I had to choreograph. The title speaks for itself: bow down and worship Him. That’s what we were created to do; and it’s the most humbling experience to be before the Lord of Hosts knowing you are not worthy to be in His presence yet He wants to commune with you. Who are we that He thinks of us? We are so

I hope you guys are touched and blessed by my selection. May you continue the good fight and ENDURE until the end. Be blessed.

Measured and Found Lacking....

I haven’t blogged for a whole month! I am sooooo sorry! I am going to keep you up to date:

This month was our 32nd Church Convention (October 11th-18th, 2009). The theme was: “Stir Up the Gifts that is Within You” from 2 Timothy 1:6. It was an awesome week! The week before was praying and then I had to prepare our church newsletter/magazine called “Endeavor” for it. I have been so busy with it that I barely had any sleep.

My birthday dinner is at the Riverview in Long Island City, Queens. The guest list started out at 30 but now might be around 17-20. I would like for it to be an intimate affair but we’ll see. While I’m on the topic of the birthday dinner, a certain someone maybe a no show. But the dinner isn’t for him, it’s for me. You don’t turn 25 everyday.


My dress!!!!!! Where do I begin? I didn’t get in contact with my dress maker so I will have to buy a dress; the problem is that I don’t see any dresses that I like! Oh woe is me! I did see this awesome dress at H&M but we’ll see.

Dance- I am so humble and blessed that the Lord has allowed me to lead the Dance Ministry at my church. The vision has grown and I will be supervising 3 dance ministries. God is so good! I went to a Praise Dance Seminar today and was so blessed! I am so excited for the next chapter.

My relationship- My relationship with God is showing me that I could be sooo much further but I am holding myself back. I have found lacking and it’s time to get to work. I realize that we as Christians are always silent while other groups shout their beliefs and lifestyles from the hilltops; it’s time to stand unashamed!
There are areas that I am lacking in but I learned in my weakness His strength is shown.


My 25th Year a.k.a My Quarterlife- I am determined to end ties, and severe things in my life that are not of God and hinder my growth. It’s time to stand and stand for all to see. I have to make sure my lifestyle echos my words. It’s a new season; there’s no turning back. Also, I am back in Bible School! I started General Bible Survey 1. It’s a lot of work!

I hope that you guys have been blessed; I apologize for such a gap in my blogging. There has been so much on my plate lately. Be blessed.

Dance!

For the past couple of months I have been like a kid counting down the days to Christmas. I am eagerly looking forward to the Ballet Intensive I will be doing for a week in July. It will be like school (10am-4pm) dancing all day. My body will ache, but I will love every minute of it! Did I mention that I love to dance? Lol. I love dance since the first Christmas I saw "The Nutcracker". The obsession grew as I became exposed to Fred Astaire & Ginger Rogers, Gregory Hines and the movie "Center Stage". Everytime I hear a song, I automatically come up with the choreography to go with it. I remember the first song I created a dance to was "Keep the Candle Burning" by Point of Grace. I had my brother, sister, and cousins dancing. It was hilarious! Thank God no one filmed it, I would have burned the tape. But I digress, I was called into the dance ministry at a young age and took it over before I finished high school. I remember when we did the first dance with me leading the ministry. It was to the song "Come Worship the Lord" by Darwin Hobbs. I was so scared, smh. I can truly say that the Lord has brought me a mighty long way. I still get butterflies in my stomach before I dance but now it feels more like an adernaline rush; when you know the Lord has called you for a particular ministry wouldn't you be excited? When I started taking Ballet last year it was so much work but it was also so much fun. I love every minute of it and constantly think about what I will learn in the next class. Maybe I will become good enough to join a company, lol. You never know; with God ALL things are possible.

She's Got the Look

Today was our S.En.S.E. (Sisters Encouraging Sisters In Excellence) seminar/meeting. It was the first seminar I help lead out. I was assigned to do a seminar on fashion. We focused on how to look modest yet fashionable and dressing as well as wearing the best accessories for your figure. We had a blast! We also had the girls cut outfits out of magazines and pick appropriate outfits for school, work, and church. We end up going over our normal time....... I am still looking forward to having a Saturday to myself but I know right now my Saturdays belong to the different ministries I am attached to. And to think I still have to squeeze in time for dance practice! Sigh. Keep me in prayer, lol.